It’s a classic game. Folks must have marvelled at this intriguing phenomenon for generations but, thanks to social media, now everyone can play along from at home.
Ask a young woman how attractive she and her friends are on a scale from 1 to 10.
A common answer?
“We’re all tens.”
Queue the mockery, right? That goes against how men see the world. I wouldn’t be surprised if DiCaprio rated himself an 8.5.
Men like precision and honesty. Knowing you’re a 6 tells you your standing in the world – and how to improve. Giving yourself a perfect ten is an obvious lie. It’s cringeworthy and deranged.
… at least, it is if you’re a guy.
When a woman says she and her friends are all tens, it comes from a different place.
A truly beautiful thing about the feminine mind is the ability to see what’s truly beautiful in those she loves. Thank God, right? That’s how a woman is able to look at a man, see past the scars and love handles, and say he’s the most handsome dude she’s ever been with.
Of course, this can express itself in unhealthy ways. If an average woman feels as though she’s a ten, that can be from her healthy confidence… or a raging narcissism that’s utterly intolerant of the slightest whiff of imperfection.
An example of this in action? The start of Barbie, where anything real or short of perfect was so unthinkable that they refused to face it. They saw Margot Robbie as flawed and ugly because her heels touched the ground.
Margot Robbie.
And if an average girl thinks she deserves a sought-after man – or any man, really – just because she thinks she’s a ten…
But that’s the shadow of this feminine virtue. The ability to see something flawed as perfect might be deluded but, guys, where would we be without such optimistic ladies around?
Besides, you can’t point the finger. Not if you think women should (or already secretly do) think like men.
Or you dismiss something as unimportant because it doesn’t matter to you.
Or if you have simple answers to complex questions. Like, say, you think society would be better if it followed a creed you could fit on a bumper sticker.
Or you think you can psychoanalyse someone off a single tweet.
Face it, you’re just as deluded – but without the adorable femininity to justify it.
Self-deception is human. You can’t free yourself from it. But every lie you tell yourself weakens and paralyses you. It leaves you broken, flawed and blind.
Only the truth can set you free, yet you willingly turn away from it.
The first step to facing it is to admit Your Story Isn’t About You – which is also the name of my guide to recognising your own blind spots.
It includes dozens of sections.
That’s dozens of ways you’re letting yourself miss what’s in front of you.
It’s why I recommend folks read, reread and apply it. Fixing any of these will stop you thinking you’re a ten when you’re really not – and will stop you judging others for that same mistake.
Download it from this page:
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